Stupid Cupid: Part 2


This gem came in this morning while I was on my way to JFK to catch my flight to LA. I'm here for an audition which is always stressful so this definitely helped ease the tension.

I mean... I do have great hair, but we gotta work on your approach, buddy. Also - F-Bombs in the first sentence are really aggressive. As is that punctuation. It is, however, sort of troubling that we are a 63% match... like, what could I possibly have in common with this person? Other than our obvious shared interest in great hair. BLESS.

In other news, I have learned a lesson:

A "glass of wine" is never just a glass of wine.

My gentleman caller tried all weekend to get me to make a late night trip to his apartment for "a glass of wine". Each time I declined, citing the late hour as my reason, which I hoped would make it clear that I wasn't a "late night glass of wine" kind of girl. This last time it happened I decided to be a bit clearer and offered when I might be free to go OUT for a glass of wine, or better yet grab dinner, and he just plain didn't respond. I gave him one more chance and wrote him today to say I had been called to LA for a last minute audition (100% true) and so wouldn't be available when I originally offered but hoped we could get together when I got back. Nothing.

I hate men.

I will also be ending all correspondence from now on with "kthnx".

With Grace and Good Humor/kthnx,

My name is Mary Lane Haskell and my two "claims to fame" are that I have Dolly Parton's fax number and that Reese Witherspoon once liked a post on my Instagram.  I am an actor, a writer, and a profound Chipotle enthusiast making my way in Los Angeles while trying to stay true to my family's southern roots, all with grace and a touch a good humor.  I'm so glad you're here!

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