Stupid Cupid: Part 4


​​Just when I thought the crazies had flown north for the summer. You've missed them, I know.

But let's think about this one for a minute. He wants to do my errands. He wants to PayPal me for no reason. Is it just me, or is this person saying that he'll pay ME for the chance to do my errands? If that's the case then this might be the most promising OkCupid message I've ever recieved. I have lots of groceries that he can go pick up for me. And it's getting to be laundry time... I almost reached for the moss green Hard Tails today but found some running shorts tucked behind them.

Also... I shared this with a girlfriend of mine and it turns out that not only has she received this exact message VERBATIM, but has also received that first crazy message I got from the guy wanting to adopt me as his sister and drink Kool-Aid.

She said it best: "We are one. One dumping ground for lunatics."

Do you think they just copy/paste this shit and send it out en masse just to mess with us? I mean - they can't possibly be serious. Can they?

In the meantime I'm just glad to have a friend in all of this. We should really start a support group. Feel free to leave any crazy messages y'all have received in the comments section. We'll laugh hysterically then cry into our wine together.x

With Grace and Good Humor,

My name is Mary Lane Haskell and my two "claims to fame" are that I have Dolly Parton's fax number and that Reese Witherspoon once liked a post on my Instagram.  I am an actor, a writer, and a profound Chipotle enthusiast making my way in Los Angeles while trying to stay true to my family's southern roots, all with grace and a touch a good humor.  I'm so glad you're here!

POPULAR POSTS